Winter is truly a mind-bending season, is it not? Unless you are a cold-weather freak, an exercise addict, or a voyeur of people in large, enclosed spaces, you find yourself trapped in an escape room of your own design. I realize that those who are not four-season feathered friends may not relate to this dilemma at all. But the lack of decent sunshine and the ability to enjoy life without paying an entrance fee rots some of us from the inside out. So, it is just one of those weeks.
I identify this phenomenon with the inability to expand my thoughts beyond a few minutes. How many of you remember “Hogan’s Heroes?” This comical television sitcom launched in 1965 and ran through 1971. Yes, I know – some of you were not even twinkles in someone’s eyes back then – but it was set in a Nazi Germany prisoner-of-war camp during World War II. For those who do not know of it, or have long since forgotten, a search will no doubt bring up episodes for viewing. But I digress.
My mindset today is that of Colonel Klink’s bumbling, blundering, highly unmilitary, but loveable 300-pound Sergeant of the Guard, Master Sergeant, Hans Schultz. Like me, those who do remember, only think of one line from this character’s repertoire, “I know nothing.” It makes me giggle to think that most of you will even read that with his unmistakable German accent.
Winter does this to me. I have a gazillion thoughts in my own personal prison, but unless I am quick enough to grab my phone, open the notes app, and hit the record button, they are lost into oblivion. My attention span resembles that of most three-year-olds. It is downright shameful.
So, I am sure you will find the humor in a comment that a friend posed to me this past week, “When is your TicTok channel going to be live?” I belly-laughed out loud. I absolutely refuse to allow myself to be drawn into a platform that has a 30-second time limit. And it is appalling to me that we, as a society, are being downsized to humor that must grab our attention in less than a minute to have value. And yet, here I sit, seemingly unable to maintain an intelligent thought past a few minutes. Is that ironic, or not?
I know that days of unlimited sunshine are just around the corner, so I push myself to focus. Some days it is an uncomfortable stretch. Yes, times are changing, and technology is the continuing wave of the future. I just hope, somehow, that future evolves into more than a 30-second thought. Good heavens, could Ishmael have ever relinquished Ahab’s obsessive quest with Moby Dick in a minute or less? Ah, but that is fodder for yet another rant.
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