One of the best things about getting older for me is being comfortable in my own skin. Growing up I always worried about my hair, my body, my self-esteem, and my ability to just fit in and be accepted. Sadly, it took all these years to love who I am. And finally, I do.
Now, that is not to say I am perfect in every way. Ha! That should make you laugh. The knowledge we amass through years of doubt is exhaustive. And I still have moments when I scream, “Why me?” But as I step back to look at the big picture, I realize that I am not a better person because I have remedied my faults, but because I have accepted them.
So, what are my faults (she asks as she laughs maniacally)? You name it and I have failed at it. I used to lose sleep and suffer documentable anxiety over acts of human nature that are inherent in all of us. Strangely, I always believed I could rise above the norm. Of course, that thought put me on the “Rich and Famous” list – in my dreams. How infallible are we really?
That disturbing thought took me to a fascinating read – Top 10 Common Faults In Human Thought - Listverse. While I emphatically declare that I am not prone to fall into a few of these categories, I am a diabolical poster child for a chosen few.
On top of my list is the “Gambler’s Fallacy.” I cannot explain how many times I have lamented, “Seriously? What are the odds?” My best friend and I frequent our local casino every few weeks. While we label it our day-drinking Beer Day, we are secretly conniving about how to break the odds by playing the right slot machine at the right time and leaving richer than we entered. And that, my friends, is more than a fallacy. It is intellectual suicide. The thought that I have not won recently is not a guarantee that I will win now. Would someone please beat that into my head?
And then there is the “Self-Fulfilling Prophecy.” Oh my. How many times have you altered your behavior because of what you fear might happen, and sure enough, it happens anyway? You may even do it without thinking about it. As the Listverse article suggests, relationships are hardest hit by this phenomenon. We harbor trust issues and respond accordingly only to realize that our responses exacerbated a problem that in reality did not even exist. It happens and even I am guilty.
Okay, so I am a hot mess. Thankfully, however, I do not fall prey to the “Herd Mentality” or “Reactance” theories. I dance to the beat of my own drummer. What others think, do, wear, etc. seldom affects me personally. I am a leader, not a follower.
Unless, of course, the new trend is homemade chocolate-covered croissants stuffed with cream cheese icing – then I am all in. Herd me oh shepherd-master! See? I am not a total outsider. Ah, but that is fodder for yet another rant.
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